One year since Dx!

Every day may not be good, but there is something good in every day.  – Unknown

Yup, it has been one year since my diagnosis.  I was in a bit of a “funk” last week, and I think I finally figured out what was bothering me.  February 1st was the one-year anniversary of my biopsy, and February 2nd was the one-year anniversary of receiving “the bad news.”  I think I was subconsciously (and also a little consciously) reliving those days of a year ago, and they were truly 2 of the worst days of my life.  On a happier note, 2/1/12 was also our 28^th wedding anniversary.  Although the day was somewhat clouded by my thoughts of the previous year, Ken and I went out for a really nice dinner at the Atlantic Ocean Grille on the Cocoa Beach Pier.  We like to go for the early bird special because it’s a lot less expensive, we beat the crowds, and we can almost always get a table by the window overlooking the ocean.  The waitress asked us if we were locals or from another state.  We said we were locals, and I made the “mistake” of saying we were just out to have a nice dinner on our anniversary.  She wished us a Happy Anniversary, and that was the end of that…..until we finished our delicious meal…..and she brought us a “to-die-for” decadent piece of chocolate cake with a beautifully decorated plate (see photo).  What were we to do?!  Send it back?  Hah!  So we ate every last bit of it, and it was heavenly.  I really do try hard to avoid chocolate, caffeine, sugar, flour, etc., but sometimes I just have no will power.  That was one of those times. 

I’m very happy to report that the “funk” only lasted a couple of days.  Now I’m back to feeling very happy to be alive and loving life again! 

Our good friends, Debbie and Bill, treated us to another anniversary celebration at a different restaurant on the Pier last Friday night, which was great fun.  Delicious food, great live music, and wonderful company – a fun evening. 

I’ve been trying hard to keep up a good exercise regimen.  On really good days, I bike for half an hour, walk for 35 minutes, and play racquetball for half an hour – yup, 95 minutes of exercise.  One day was actually 108 minutes because I did some extra biking that day.  It was awesome.  Sadly, I don’t manage to find the time to do that every day, but I do try to do SOMETHING every day….even if it’s just the 35-minute walk.  Hopefully we’ll get out kayaking again one of these days, too.

Yesterday I went to see the ophthalmologist about my watery eyes.  After waiting an hour and a half(!) to see the doctor – could he be Dr. Always Late, II? – he told me my tear ducts were totally shriveled up and closed off (thanks to chemo).  He said he could TRY to ream them out, but he couldn’t guarantee it would work, although he thought it was worth a try.  Frankly, the thought of him sticking “reamers” in my eyes didn’t excite me too much, but I bucked up and said, “Bring it on.”  SOOOO, he used 4 different reamers of varying sizes, starting with the smallest one first and working his way up.  Needless to say, it's quite uncomfortable having something jammed in your eye and reamed around.  But I think it actually helped.  They seem to be watering less.  We'll see.  I have to go back in 3 weeks, and he might do some more reaming.  We'll see how my eyes are doing at that point and go from there.  Surgery is another option – not stents as Dr. Sprawls had suggested – but going in and clipping the tear ducts to open them up, but he said he really didn’t want to do that if he can avoid it.  I concur.  On a different note, I also asked him if there was any type of surgery that might help my damaged right eye (from when I stuck an ice pick in it at the tender age of 4……my poor mother…….).  He said he thought there probably was, but he would refer me to a tertiary center because it would be a pretty labor intensive operation.  I might look into that down the road.  It would be kind of fun to have vision in both eyes – it would probably improve my peripheral vision and depth perception, too. 

On a sad note, a high school classmate of mine, Astronaut Janice Voss, passed away this past week from breast cancer.  She was a really delightful person and very brilliant.  And way too young (55) to die from breast cancer.  On another sad note, the sister of a friend was diagnosed with breast cancer this past week.  It hits me so hard when I hear of people “I know” receiving the bad news or passing away from the disease.  It’s more than my emotions can handle. 

Ken and I have been thinking about where we might go for our “special trip,” thanks to the generosity of my big huge, loving, generous family and friends of the family!  We’re leaning toward St. John, a beautiful tropical island in the U.S. Virgin Islands.  It’s a place we had hoped to go for our 25^th anniversary a few years ago, but the economy was really bad then, and we just didn’t want to spend the money.  So we went to Applebee’s for dinner instead!  Now we have so many things to celebrate – our 28^th anniversary was last week, both of our birthdays are next week, and the biggest celebration is the end of my cancer treatments and being alive and loving life again! 

Well, it’s time for me to call it a day.  Feeling very tired today.  Maybe yesterday’s “eye reamings” wore me out…..that, and working on the taxes today.

So, good night, one and all.  Hugs to everybody!    

Our decadent anniversary dessert!